Sunday, September 9, 2007

Frequently Asked Questions

I’ve gotten a lot of questions and comments lately that I can’t respond to individually. Here are some general responses:

This is your pet peeve. You should also blog about mine, which is _____.
Answer: Actually, I don’t consider quotation marks a peeve. I just think it’s funny to misinterpret them, almost always. This is not the case with most other grammatical errors, although the occasional dangling modifier is pretty amusing. Somebody else can blog about your thing if they want; I really think the genius here is the specificity. Check out my sidebar though; some of those people might already blog about your thing. Especially you legion of apostrophe pedants. 

How can you make fun of other people when you made the following grammatical error ____?
Answer: I am not a grammar expert. Sure, I am living in a glass house intentionally obfuscating other people’s usage, and therefore usually correct errors that other people point out. The point of this site, though, is not to demonstrate my grammatical superiority, it’s to have a little fun with language.

This blog is a waste of time. I can’t believe someone wrote an article about it.
Answer: What's a bigger waste of time? Blogging about something you find amusing, or telling a blogger how dumb or boring her blog is? I can't believe people are interested in it either, I'm just doing this for fun.

Those quotation marks are totally acceptable, stop being so mean.
Answer: Remember what I said about intentional obfuscation? I’m just trying to have fun. If you don’t think this is fun, it’s probably not the blog for you.
What do you think about this grammatical issue: ____?
Answer: I'll do my best to respond to your specific question, but maybe you should ask grammar girl or look it up in a style manual of your choice. My expertise is in rhetorical theory and criticism, which is only somewhat related to grammar.

Why are quotation marks such a big deal to you anyway?

Answer: They really aren't. I'm actually not a grammar fanatic at all, although clear writing is important to me. I have an actual job and PhD education which are higher priorities for me than anything quotation-mark related. I started this blog for fun never expecting anybody to notice it except my family and friends.

For Linguistics Nerds Only: Don't you know about language change? Why be such a prescriptivist? Alternate: Thanks for fighting for pure English against the uneducated masses!

My real intellectual position is more of a descriptivist. I understand that language is constructed socially and therefore naturally evolves and changes and is not subject to absolutes. I conceive this blog as a kind of language play a la Derrida that also demonstrates the limits of such permissiveness, which becomes unclear writing. I'm trying to have fun with language, not protect it or enforce a "right" way to write or speak.

What is the rule for end punctuation and quotation marks? Aren't you doing it wrong?

It is standard in the US to put all end punctuation (periods, commas, question marks, exclamation points) inside quotation marks. My Canadian high school English teacher taught me that when the quotation marks are ironic or setting off a word or phrase because you are talking about the word itself, then the punctuation goes outside. I like this rule better, and it seems like a worthwhile distinction to make on this blog. So even though I live in the US, I do it this way: when I am quoting someone else, punctuation inside quotation marks. All other uses, outside. I figure it's fine as long as I'm consistent, but you probably shouldn't follow my example for formal writing.

May I use some of your photos on my blog?

Sure, as long as you give credit and a link for where you found them, and limit yourself to no more than 3 or 4. I want your readers to visit my site to see more!

Is it ok if I link to your blog?

It's more than ok! I really appreciate it when people like my blog enough to recommend it to their friends and readers.

How about a link exchange?

sorry, I don't do those. I believe that links should be genuine recommendations to one's readers, so I'll add things to my own sidebar at my discretion, but not as a quid pro quo. Also, if I linked back to all the links I get, it would be pretty overwhelming.

This blog is "great!" You "are" so "funny!"

Yeah, nobody's ever said that before. Good one.


While I'm at it, here are some questions no one has asked, but might some day:

I sent you something weeks ago, why haven't you used it?
Answer: Sorry, I am about 6 weeks behind on just filtering my emails. I post ones I think are funny in the moment, it's a little arbitrary. I have a whole other full time job, I can't put that much time into quotation marks. I will email you back, though, if/when yours gets posted.

What are your guidelines for comments?
Answer: I'm so glad you asked. Here are some guidelines:
1) spam will be deleted as soon as I notice it. Trolling will be deleted at my discretion.
2) I know I have to put up with people correcting my spelling/grammar, but I appreciate it if you do it nicely. I also get a little testy when people do this anonymously, because it does not allow us to see any of their perfect or imperfect prose.
3) please keep the tone light and friendly, if we aren't having fun, why bother with the "blog" at all? (It goes without saying that violent or sexually explicit language is rarely called for, and I am pleased to see that thus far I haven't had occasion to say so.)

Do you have a policy about responding to email?
Answer: I do now. I used to try to respond to everyone, but it's been getting a little overwhelming. So I'm cutting back. I'll still email submitters when I post their thing, but I will no longer email people to explain why theirs didn't get posted. I will respond to other "personal" emails at my discretion. This means, if I feel like it. I'd like to respond to everyone personally, and I appreciate you taking the time to email me. I am trying to resist letting this blog take over my life.

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